On intentionally spending time with the family
What a Netflix show and a shirt taught me about parenting
One of the biggest changes Nouelle and I made recently is intentionally spending time with our kids by watching shows they love with them. Whereas before, we kind of just let them watch on their own (granting we’ve vouched the show) and we will be off in our room watching something completely different.
This time around, we set aside time every week to watch a show of their choice. We agreed on Spy x Family on Netflix which, if I were being honest, was a little meh—at least the first couple of episodes. Okay, there were a ton of plotholes and I was literally falling asleep in the middle. But then again, we were determined as parents to do this activity as a family—to show our kids that we cared just as much about the things they were into.
We kept watching and by the time we got to maybe the 7th or 8th episode, I was truly enjoying the show and I could see everyone else were just as well. Post-watching, the family had discussions about the episode, which characters we likened ourselves to, and reciting random lines from the show. They’ve been fans for some time and were game enough not to spoil the rest of the season for us.
The other day, while on our way to church, our daughter chose to wore her Uniqlo shirt which featured characters from Spy x Family. I’ve seen her wear it before and didn’t give it any thought—just another shirt. Right before we got in the car, she told me with a smile and much excitement, "now you're able to name the characters in my shirt!"
And for a dad, that's just a clear W (that’s shorthand for win) that I'd never had the opportunity to experience had we not put in actual effort to meet our kids where they were. Had we been focused too much on our needs, we would’ve missed out on what Nouelle loves to call “magic moments” with our kids.
As a quick aside, and much to Nouelle’s dismay, the kids and I have been using the NBA Playoffs as a way to bond during times when the LA Lakers play. I love how they really get into the game while getting a good math exercise whenever I ask how much points we’re leading/trailing. Miggy, our 8-year-old even ended his prayer with, “I pray that LeBron’s team wins.” Hey, don’t look at me!1
As parents, we can easily get misled thinking free time equals me time. That’s okay to some extent—I can’t imagine not having time to myself, holed up somewhere, reading my Kindle—but we need to be mindful and intentionally carve out time to spend with our kids. Whether it’s by watching their favorite shows together or something as mundane as being a passenger on their make-believe vehicle (with speedometers reaching 1,000,000,000 kilometers-per-hour), these magic moments can easily turn into core memories that they will treasure throughout their lives. ♥️
They did win. https://www.nba.com/game/gsw-vs-lal-0042200234